I will be honest, moving from two kids to three kids has been a struggle for me. I won’t go into the finer details, but those with a sideline view into my life hear all about the tantrums, fights and other parenting conundrums my kids are throwing my way. On a few occasions I have said to my inner circle “I am struggling”.
My church recently had Ben Higgins, from Life Church as guest speaker. He spoke a timely message about encouragement and being mindful of the words we speak to others and ourselves. During that message, Ben spoke the words:
“Our words shape our future – they don’t just speak to what is, but what will be.”
It was a good reminder for me to be mindful about what I’m speaking and the atmosphere I’m creating with my external and internal dialog. One morning last week, as I made the bed and contemplated what the day held, I really felt these words strongly in my heart:
You’re not struggling, you’re learning.
And you know what, it’s true, I’m learning. I love how this shift in language and understanding can change the way I view a situation or myself. I am learning how to be a Mum to my growing family. Sometimes I make mistakes and often it’s difficult… because I’m learning and so are my kids.
2 Corinthians 12:9 says: “My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness.”
This verse has become a bit of a mantra for me during difficult moments with my kids. My weakness, lack of insight or parenting mistakes are ok because that’s when God shows up. Sometimes, He shows up by giving me keys to a situation, sometimes He shows up by giving me a hug and encouragement to try again next time.
And so, I will focus on the learning, not on the struggle. Today’s lesson is in the language I am speaking over my heart and what this season is producing for the future. To approach this season of parenthood as learning rather than struggling is somewhat freeing. It allows me to move from things that restrict me to things that release me:
Another day dawns, here I go, watch me learn again today.
Love Jess xxoo