Category Archives: Life

20 million dreams

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What would you do if you won 20 million dollars? Oddly, it was this question that started us on our journey to resign from our jobs and head overseas. It’s funny what God can use to prompt you.

The question of $20M came up again in our household recently. The idea of winning that much money actually makes me sick. Who on earth would need that excessive amount when there are children dying in war, families being ripped apart by false promises of a better life and drought crippling whole nations?

However, if for some reason I did win $20 million, I would call together a group of like-minded individuals and dream away the week with ideas about how to invest into people. We would turn those dreams into reality, not by rushing into things, but wisely researching and establishing meaningful and sustainable businesses and programs. I would call Sarah Starrenburg, Adam James, all of our siblings and their wives/partners, Will and Laura (by Skype of course), Ben and Amy, Rian and Sally, The Hannaway Clan, Mike and Karen (more Skype time) and… ok, ok, that’s already a lot of people!

I would:

  • Open a store in inner Brisbane stocking only ethical, eco-friendly and sustainable fashion and beauty products
  • Build a house for my family with spare rooms and living areas to provide a sanctuary for tired families, missionaries or anyone needing a Selah (with an extra car for them to use)
  • Do something in Africa around eye health
  • Establish ‘something’ with (not for) the homeless in our city
  • Do something to empower our beautiful Indigenous people
  • Create and empower already existing support-networks for refugees
  • Look at some of the worst areas for human trafficking and empower the locals to stop the cycle
  • Fund couples looking to adopt
  • Support foster children and families in some way
  • Bless local school Chaplains and youth workers
  • Get along side and support the many wonderful and best-practice not-for-profit organisations that are already up and running
  • Take my whole family over to Rio for the Olympics and work with a group like Exodus Cry or Save the Children
  • Fund all sorts of small business ideas and local enterprises

And that’s just me, in the last five minutes… I might need more than $20M 😉

The question of $20 million might sound fun and silly, but for the Greenwoods it seems to push us into action. It reveals what we are passionate about and what God is stirring. It is a little scary really because last time we lightheartedly pondered this question, God followed it up with a “Is money really all that’s stopping you?”

“Oh dear” I hear myself think. You may recall an earlier post about rest; the main idea was that we were in a season of rest until we could dream again. Oh dear… haha.

I personally love the season Tim and I are in. We have the space to process, hear, learn, grow and it’s thrilling and stretching all at the same time. Almost every day we are sharing ideas and discussing the deeper issues of life, love and identity. Amidst the sleepless nights, grumpy Mummy moments, baby talk, Lego building and housework, God is continuing to move. We feel a stirring again. However, I have to warn you, it’s not the typical type of ‘stirring’ we expect from Christians. Although we can have big and grand dreams, those are not the end game. For us, success is not measured by what other people see us doing. It’s the little choices, conversations and relationships that we invest into every day that matter. Our 20 million dollar dreams start with our every-day, ordinary lives and how we choose to live them.

Love Jess xxoo

Unforced Rhythms

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Matthew 11:28-30 (The Message Version)

28-30 “Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.”

I recently left Tim at home with the girls so I could attended a local church by myself, but what unfolded was not the spiritual connection I was hoping for. The service was lovely, the atmosphere friendly and the people had beautiful intentions and yet… as the Pastor’s message unfolded I felt like I was witnessing two separate and competing schools of thought. Needless to say I was perplexed by the contradictions I heard during the hour and a half I was there.

The first main train of thought was that all you had to do to be a follower of Jesus was to come to Him. Nothing else. There is nothing else you need to do. The second was that to be a ‘true’ Christian you must attend a local Church. Without local Church fellowship Jesus died for nothing. What the? Do we have to come to church to be classified as a ‘true’ Christian? Does Christian fellowship and spiritual growth only occur within the context of organised religion? When you quote “I will build My Church”, I’m pretty sure God had more in mind than Western Church structures and Sunday meetings.

I desperately wanted to sit with this Pastor and ask questions about what He was saying, but unfortunately large gatherings don’t lend themselves to open discussions. Perhaps he was having an off day and wasn’t articulating what he wanted to say very well? Perhaps I was actually ‘hearing’ something different to what he was saying (I know this happens to preachers a lot)?

In the past I might have agreed with most of the things this passionate preacher was saying, but those days are looooooooong gone. I am living in the ‘unforced’ zone these days, refusing to march to someone else’s expectations (or my perceived expectations) of what ‘being connected’ means. I am continuing to learn the unforced rhythms of grace within a transparent and loving community… and sometimes we even go to Church 😉

I LOVE doing life with my family and close friends. Many of them challenge and encourage me to think outside the box. They aren’t afraid to highlight lies I’m believing and through open and honest chats we discover more about our King called Jesus. It is not heavy or ill-fitting. Tim and I will chat for hours and hours about the character of God – podcasts or sermons we have listened to, books we’ve read, scriptures we have encountered and other conversations we’ve had. It is exciting and we treasure it. It is a delightful season of growth and even though it is stretching and challenging, it is also free and light because it is unforced. It is like listening to a heart beat. It is like a bird flying effortlessly in the sky. It is the rhythm of grace.

Love Jess xxoo

Inspiration for January

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A few pieces from around the place that I’m ‘collecting’

“If you don’t go after what you want, you’ll never have it.
If you don’t ask, the answer is always no.
If you don’t step forward, you’re always in the same place.”
– Nora Roberts

This blog post about a different approach to ‘missions’. Some people are on non-traditional missions and I love it.

These beautiful necklaces from Kita Designs.

This stunning dress from Sustainable Fashion

Puzzles… how great are they!

Jack the Cockatiel on Instagram

Love Jess xxoo

A little light

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I haven’t posted in a while – I have written, but not posted. For some reason I feel as though this one might make it, but we will see.

An older friend recently commented that she thought the world was going down the toilet. I understand given recent global events, but if you look back through history, tragedy, war, slavery and the love of money and self are nothing new.

Knowing this does not make me indifferent by any count. I read stories about sex trafficking, see pictures of war and starvation on the TV, witness friends lives blindsided by the death of a family member, the ache of infertility, depression, sickness and so on. It can be crippling and leave your heart aching.

“Well Jess, this is all rather depressing”, I hear you thinking. The realities of life can be at times, but there is good news as well. I also read stories of great courage, see pictures of aid organisations helping others on the TV and I witness friends pick up the pieces of their lives and move slowly towards healing. It is encouraging and can leave your heart full of hope.

The sweetest thing I’ve ever heard
Is I don’t have to have the answers
Just a little light to call my own
– Sleeping at last

And here is my little light, it is the best news… it is beyond good, I can hardly describe it:

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Obviously I don’t have the answers and I don’t pretend to, but this prophecy by Zachariah (about Jesus) recorded in Luke 1, fills my heart with joy. According to this ancient text Jesus has already visited us and He is available to guide us to the path of peace amongst unrest. So, I ask Him today to show me how to bring peace and find peace in my day and in the world I live in.

If you need Morning Light from Heaven (as I daily do), He is here. He is with you. He is for you. He will guide you.

I picture it a little like this:

sunrise

Love Jess

PS – Life is a rather grand adventure isn’t it? There is so much to learn about and so many different ways to ‘grow’ as a person. You may not hear from me as much as you used to because there are things that I am learning that are only meant for me. We shall see what happens as the adventure continues to unfold.

 

 

Living Simply without the shops – Part 2

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At the end of August I wrote a blog about trying not to spend unnecessary money in the month of September (read it here). Having just realised that it’s now October, I thought I’d give you an update on the month that was.

It was a rather interesting 30 days for me and I’ll try to be as transparent as possible. During the month of September I wanted to incorporate three things into my every-day-life. These three words were my mantra for September:

Simplify. Enrich. Focus

It was important to me was that it wasn’t a pass/fail ‘project’, because that would totally undermine the point and only become a burden. My approach to September was not to just have nice ideas, but to have practical ways to incorporate these ideals into my life-style. I wrote down nine things to could do to simplify, enrich and focus my life during September and off I went. Some I did well in and others went by the way-side… I didn’t end up planting those herbs after all. Looking back, I think there were two things I really wanted to do: stop spending unnecessary money and create a culture of thankfulness. Realistically, this meant staying at home more and being mindful of my thoughts.

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Obviously, just because you can’t spend money doesn’t mean you can’t go out. You can go to the park, visit a friend, go on little adventures and a host of other things all of which are fun and interesting. Unfortunately, little Bella does not like going out. My little darling will scream the whole way of a 30 minute car-ride at times and a trip to the park can require more emotional energy from me than I used before having kids. There are times when Bell-Bell is awesome during an outing with not a tear in sight, but they aren’t that common. A trip in the car, no matter how short can easily be a joy killer. It is the age and stage – this too shall pass.
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(Cheeky monkey)

Two and a half weeks in, I was waking up every morning seriously depressed. After a few hours (and a double shot coffee) I would find myself again and the day would be pretty good. Bella was still doing two to three nighttime wake-ups, I was with the girls 24/7 without a break and we were all coming out of our third bout of illness. However, my morning depression was pretty bad, so having had horrible post-natal depression with Amy, I took myself off to see my GP. The diagnosis? Exhaustion… of course. So, I decided to ignore my Simplify and Focus mantras and took myself and the girls straight from the doctor’s office to get a coffee and some cake. It was time to relax and enrich my life a little. I believe Bella screamed the whole way home (as usual), but I had some real coffee and the memory of a nice ‘date’ still in my mind.

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From then onwards things got easier. Bella started sleeping more at night, we all became healthier, I upped my coffee intake and I knew what was going on with my emotions, which that helped at lot. On the whole I enjoyed the month of September and I know I will continue to do some of the nine things I wrote out. It’s odd that to living a simpler life in our culture is something you have to ‘fight’ for at times. You would think it would be easier, but it goes against cultural norms. Why be happy with what you have when you can have and/or could afford more?

With September at an end, I have $45.60 to donate to a worthy cause. I don’t know who I will donate to yet, but I know it will focus on children either in trafficking or community development.

And if you’re wondering… yes I did my share of baking and slice making this month 🙂

Love Jess xx00

PS – I read this awesome blog this morning and just had to share… Are you living Deliberately?

Living Simply without the shops

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Sometimes it’s hard to keep little people entertained. I’ve found (and so have other mums) that if we do an activity in the morning my kids are less painful at the end of the day. The problem is, going to the shops can be an easy way to burn up time and create extra stimulation for their little brains. We don’t often buy things, but I have been thinking a lot about the lessons this is teaching my dear ones. Am I teaching them that shopping equals happiness? When I do buy little things (they don’t need), am I teaching them that to value the many toys they already own? So, we do stickers and colouring, water play and dolls-house, Lego and pretend to be horses (ugh, the horses), and… we bake.

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Amy’s at that wonderful age where she wants to help me.

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This morning I woke up with baking on the brain, but my rules were simple: If I don’t have it, we can’t make it. I didn’t want to spend any money and make a trip to the shops. If I needed a piping bag, well too bad. If I didn’t having baking powder, I’d have to find a substitute.

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Turning to the very yummy and creative Sweetest Menu, Amy picked out some cupcakes she wanted to make. I had to do some serious substitutions and managed to distract her with the idea of strawberry infused icing instead.

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My favour part of the whole exercise was packing up a few little cakes to take to our neighbours.

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As I struggle with the consumerism machine I’m continually fighting an internal battle. I want to buy my family treats and toys ‘just because’, but there are kids in the world who don’t have clean water. So here is a strategy I will put into place for the month of September:

  1. If we go to the shops and I’m tempted to buy that unnecessary gift for my immediate family, I will exercise more self-control and transfer the amount of said item into another account when I get home. At the end of the month, I will use that money to make a donation to an international relief agency.
  2. I will be more conscious of what I’m teaching my little ones. We can have fun in so many different ways and most of them don’t involve money. Although I rarely spend ‘just because’ money on myself, I need to make sure I’m not setting that example or expectation for my kids.

Love Jess xxoo

An ordinary extraordinary life

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I was thinking about the ‘sum’ of my life last night while my cat supervised me washing the dishes. Is there something extraordinary inside of me yet to be revealed or is it just a feeling left over from my youth days when we were constantly told we would do amazing things? Have I lived an extraordinary life? It certainly doesn’t feel like it. Do I really have something remarkable legacy to offer humankind in my future? Not that I can see.

P1070348Here’s a thought… perhaps my extraordinary, dazzling life is already present.

Perhaps it is in buying ethical products?

P1070354Perhaps it is in my heart every time I think and pray for those trapped in slavery?

Could it be in my desire to raise kids who don’t look to others to tell them who they are?

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Perhaps as I continue to live out my ordinary life I will be doing amazing things in secret. What a wonderful idea! A secret extraordinary life would probably suit me perfectly. Doing remarkable things doesn’t have to be loud and bright and seen by all as I thought in my teenaged years. I think of our Aussie farmers, working so hard to make ends meet and in my eyes they are quite frankly awe-inspiring.

I may never write a book or be known Nation-wide as the founder of a life-changing not-for-profit organisation, but I am ok with that. I will keep trying to do awesome things in secret, which at the moment mostly involves changing nappies and finishing the day without having a nervous breakdown. I amaze even myself sometimes 😉 and I am constantly delighted and inspired by most of the people I know. I guess it’s the everyday things that add up to make someone’s life significant.

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Love Jess xxoo

Someone is happier

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Contentment is not something we do very well. Are we satisfied with our house, our clothes, our latest holiday, our social photos online? More often than not, the answer is no. Even when we get our latest ‘wish list’ item we then move onto the next thing or bigger and better. If we are buying a new car or house-hold item, do we get what we need or do we go that one step more and get something a bit bigger, a bit more expensive?

Contentment is something I am continuing to learn about. As my inbox fills with emails about the latest sales and season fashions, I have realised I need to be mindful of my thoughts in order to catch out the lie that I need more things to be happy. I also need to avoid the comparison trap when I look at the lives other people lead. Comparison is the enemy of contentment.

“Look at that sea, girls – all silver and shadow and vision of things not seen.
We couldn’t enjoy its loveliness any more if we had millions of
dollars and ropes of diamonds”
– from Anne of Green Gables, Lucy Maud Montgomery

In the end contentment isn’t about what you have or don’t have, it’s a state of being and it is something I am trying to cultivate in my life. It is simply freeing once you get used to it. I am free to have something and free not to have something. ‘Things’ do not impact whether I’m happy or not. Obviously I am still learning and sometimes I look at that new winter coat with longing, but I have to remind myself that it will not make me happy. I choose to be content with the lovely jacket I already own.

Someone is happier with less than what you have
– Anonymous

Let me encourage you to start practicing contentment. It will take time, but it will also allow you to experience a sense of freedom over things and the lives of others around you.

Love Jess xxoo

Not all adventures are glamorous

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I have about six-weeks of my pregnancy to go which means I am uncomfortable, sleep badly and still have moments when I think I’m going to vomit everywhere. However life goes on and things still need to be done. This morning I had to take Shadow to the vet for a booster needle…

As I held Amy’s hand, carried the cat box and had my bag over my shoulder, the bottom of the box gave way and Shadow fell out. Luckily we were just at the door of the vet surgery. I shook off Amy’s hand, grabbed the cat and pulled the door open. As I threw the box inside, held the door open with my foot and tried to pass the cat to someone, Amy got hit in the head as she tried to fit through the little gap. So now I had a cat in one arm and a crying Amy half stuck outside, screaming and holding her head. Help did arrive, but honestly the whole thing was slightly hilarious. Plus, with being 34 weeks pregnant it must have been funny and petrifying for the others in the waiting room to watch as everything went wrong.

The vet visit itself wasn’t much better, but we survived.

After I embarrassingly accepted help getting to the car, Amy started yelling that she was hungry, which was when I may or may not have lost the plot and told her off. My previous idea of getting a coffee on the way home went out the window as I now had wicked reflux and no energy left to face anything else.

Half way home Amy started crying because she put her fingers into the cat box and I’m assuming Shadow gave her a nip. The cat then went crazy scratching and carrying on and Amy started laughing as the cat made a jail break and got out of the box. There was nothing I could do but keep driving. After successfully navigating another around-a-bout, I felt something furry on my leg and realise the cat had made his way under my seat and was now setting up shop in front of the break pedal. At this point I was beyond caring if we lived or died, but we ended up back at home without any more drama.

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Unfortunately I told Amy we could do some painting today and we’d go buy some ‘kid friendly’ paint (if there is really such a thing) after we dropped Shadow home. However, I knew I needed a moment to gather whatever energy and happy thoughts I had left. As I sat on the couch relaying these events to my family, Amy started doing my make-up/painting my face with a paintbrush and I decide I may never move again. If I could drink, a small glass of wine would have been perfect right then. Instead I found an old and slightly malformed Freddo Frog in the fridge… that did it.

The truth is that sometimes ‘adventures’ are not so glamorous and involve dropping your cat and yelling at your daughter, but it does make a good story.

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Love Jess xxoo

Gratitude

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We’ll give thanks to you with gratitude
For lessons learned in how to trust in you
That we are blessed beyond what we could ever dream in abundance or in need
– Nichole Nordeman

As Tim’s job searching marches into it’s third month and my job prospects are close to nil due to limited availability and the approaching birth of our little boy in May, there is so much that I’m grateful for.

I am grateful for our overseas trip and the timing of it all. I treasure all the things we did and places we went and I have no regrets, not one.

I am grateful that when we returned from overseas that someone generously gave us a car. Having only one car in this day and age is extremely difficult, but having no car at all isn’t really viable. What an incredible bless.

I am grateful for my lovely house and the air-conditioning we installed when we moved in all those years ago (dang it’s so hot at the moment).

I am grateful that although Tim is currently job-hunting, that we can spend this time together as a family. It’s a wonderful opportunity not to be missed or dismissed. I am also grateful that Tim has been able to pick up a few days of labouring work here and there. That little bit of money is a godsend. Really, I’m grateful for every dollar and I’m not over-exaggerating.

I am grateful for my family and the monthly lunches we have with each side. Lunches that are filled with laughter, deep conversations and a genuine interest in each others lives. I know how blessed I am.

I am grateful for my sisters who share the everyday stories, sympathize with me on the down days and laugh at the funny things Amy has done.

I am grateful for my friends who send me pictures of their clothes when they can’t decide what to wear, discuss how much coffee they’ve had and over-share about the weird things our bodies or minds are doing.

I am grateful that although I live in an expensive country that the public health system runs fairly well, our public schools are well funded, politicians are uncorrupted (as far as I know) and I don’t have to carry a gun for personal security.

Sometimes I’m grateful for the small things, like my brother making me a delicious coffee this morning. Other times, it’s for the bigger seasonal things that I am learning, like God teaching me about rest and that at times it’s necessary to slow everything down in order to dream again.

In a culture that teaches happiness is based on what we have or more often don’t have, it’s good to be grateful and I am ever so grateful!

Love Jess xxoo